Lewis Carroll: The Hunting of the Snark

2. Fit the Second: THE BELLMAN'S SPEECH (continued)

The Bellman perceived that their spirits were low,
     And repeated in musical tone
Some jokes he had kept for a season of woe--
     But the crew would do nothing but groan.

He served out some grog with a liberal hand,
     And bade them sit down on the beach:
And they could not but own that their Captain looked grand,
     As he stood and delivered his speech.

"Friends, Romans, and countrymen, lend me your ears!"
     (They were all of them fond of quotations:
So they drank to his health, and they gave him three cheers,
     While he served out additional rations).

"We have sailed many months, we have sailed many weeks,
     (Four weeks to the month you may mark),
But never as yet ('tis your Captain who speaks)
     Have we caught the least glimpse of a Snark!

"We have sailed many weeks, we have sailed many days,
     (Seven days to the week I allow),
But a Snark, on the which we might lovingly gaze,
     We have never beheld till now!

"Come, listen, my men, while I tell you again
     The five unmistakable marks
By which you may know, wheresoever you go,
     The warranted genuine Snarks.

"Let us take them in order. The first is the taste,
     Which is meager and hollow, but crisp:
Like a coat that is rather too tight in the waist,
     With a flavor of Will-o-the-wisp.

"Its habit of getting up late you'll agree
     That it carries too far, when I say
That it frequently breakfasts at five-o'clock tea,
     And dines on the following day.

"The third is its slowness in taking a jest.
     Should you happen to venture on one,
It will sigh like a thing that is deeply distressed:
     And it always looks grave at a pun.

"The fourth is its fondness for bathing-machines,
     Which is constantly carries about,
And believes that they add to the beauty of scenes--
     A sentiment open to doubt.

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