William Shakespeare: King Henry IV Part II

ACT II. 4. SCENE IV. London. The Boar's-head Tavern in Eastcheap. (continued)

DOLL.
Ah, you sweet little rogue, you! Alas, poor ape, how thou
sweatest! come, let me wipe thy face; come on, you whoreson chops:
ah, rogue! i' faith, I love thee: thou art as valorous as Hector
of Troy, worth five of Agamemnon, and ten times better than the Nine
Worthies: ah, villain!

FALSTAFF.
A rascally slave! I will toss the rogue in a blanket.

DOLL.
Do, an thou darest for thy heart: an thou dost, I'll canvass
thee between a pair of sheets.

[Enter Music.]

PAGE.
The music is come, sir.

FALSTAFF.
Let them play. Play, sirs. Sit on my knee, Doll. A rascal
bragging slave! The rogue fled from me like quicksilver.

DOLL.
I' faith, and thou followedst him like a church. Thou whoreson
little tidy Bartholomew boar-pig, when wilt thou leave fighting
o' days and foining o' nights, and begin to patch up thine old body
for heaven?

[Enter, behind, Prince Henry and Poins, disguised as drawers.]

FALSTAFF.
Peace, good Doll! do not speak like a death's-head; do
not bid me remember mine end.

DOLL.
Sirrah, what humour 's the prince of?

FALSTAFF.
A good shallow young fellow: 'a would have made a good
pantler; a' would ha' chipped bread well.

DOLL.
They say Poins has a good wit.

FALSTAFF.
He a good wit! hang him, baboon! his wit's as thick as
Tewksbury mustard; there 's no more conceit in him than is in a
mallet.

DOLL.
Why does the prince love him so, then?